Geek Girlfriend Chart v2.0

This was written a fair while back when one of my school friends got his first girlfriend. Half of it isn't even relevent any more, but still amusing. Version 2.0 was redone to fit inside an 80 character wide terminal. Note that just having a girlfriend gets you points.
You can get the original text file here.

				 ***********************
				*************************	
				**Geek Girlfriend Chart**
				*************************
				 ***********************


Does she know about your pr0n collection?
		|--yes------------>does she care?		**************
		|				|--yes--------->*At least you*
		no				no		*  have one  *
		|				|		*    1/6     *
		|			    **********		**************
	  ************			    *Consider*
	  *Doing Well*			    *yourself*
	  ************			    * lucky  *
		|			    **********
		|				|
    Is she computer literate?<------------------/
		|
		|-no->Is she prepared to learn?		*****************
	       yes		|--no------------------>*This is no good*
		|		|			*      2/6	*
	 ***************	|			*****************
	 *Where did you*	|
	 *  find her?  *	|
	 ***************	|
		|		|
		|		|
       Does she play Quake?<----/
		|
		|--no------------->Does she play any FPS?
	       yes			|--no------->Does she want to?
		|		       yes		|--no---\
		|			|	/------yes	|
   *************** ************		|	|		|
   *Your kidding,* *Impressive*<--------/	|	*******************
   *   right?    * ************	/---------------/	*At least you have*
   ***************	|	|			*something to get *
	|	   /----/<------/  *****************	* rid of her with *
	|	   |		   *Well, she still*	*       3/6	  *
   Can she code?<--/	/--------->*did pretty well*	*******************
	|		|	   *      4/6      *
	|------no-------/	   *****************
       yes---------------------------->Is she better than you?
						|	******************
						|	*Forget it, this *
						|-yes-->*will never work *
	****************			no	* your fuxxored  *
	*You found one!*			|	* and shouldn't  *
	*Only two more *<-----------------------/	*be a geek anyway*
	* miracles to  *				*      0/6       *
	*  sainthood   *				******************
	****************
		|
		|
	  Is she Asian?			*********
		|-----------yes-------->*Figures*-------\
		|			*********	|
		no					|
		|				        |
	******************				|
	*She isn't human,*	    Does she look like an Anime character?
	*    is she?	 *				|
	******************				|--------------\
		|					no	      yes
		|					|	       |
	Is she attractive?<-----------------------------/	       |
		|						       |
		|					*********************
		|					*Next time you speak*
		|--------------yes--------------------->* to God, could you *
		no					*get one for me too *
		|					*        6/6        *
		|					*********************
	*****************
	*Well, you can't*
	* have the cake *
	*and eat it too *
	*      5/6      *
	*****************
      

Bailando en mi cabeza...

Middle of winter

  • Messiah Ward Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds
  • The Darkness The Cat Empire
  • Nothing's Wrong Architecture in Helsinki
  • Jodida Pero Contenta Concha Buika
  • No Pussy Blues Grinderman
  • Mi Fado Mío Mariza

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